So here we are at Number One – THE
BEST Christmas film of all time, and after It’s
A Wonderful Life and A Christmas
Story went by you were probably thinking what on earth it could possibly
be. Well, the wait is over – here it is!
It’s my favourite Christmas film
because it can be watched all year round – you don’t need it to be Christmas to
bang it into the DVD or Blu-Ray player or to select the illegally downloaded
1080p version you have hidden away on a hard drive.
So what is it? I hear you cry, Tell
us, oh oracle of Christmas films. You have led us thus far!
Well, hang on there just a moment
and let’s see if you can guess it from the description below.
It’s a heart-warming film about a
man who flies into Los Angeles from New York on Christmas Eve to spend the holiday
season with his estranged wife and children in a last ditch attempt to patch
things up between them. She’s been working hard all year for a giant Commodities
company and as a result has risen to the top. He is a New York policeman and is
disappointed to find that his wife is now using her maiden name. Is this the
cue for a delightful romantic comedy, where through the efforts of their
adorable kids they somehow, despite all the odds, patch up their differences
and have the best Christmas ever?
Not exactly. And why is that?
Because when he’s freshening up in the executive bathroom the building is taken
over by TERRORISTS!
That’s right, this is no
soul-sucking, limp-wristed, namby-pamby, manipulative Christmas rom-com – this is DIE HARD!
In case you didn’t know - for
maximum impact that last sentence should have been read in that deep, bass boom
of that bloke who reads out the trailers for action films in cinemas. If you
didn’t do it like that, try reading it again – it’ll sound better and it’ll also
make you feel better. Promise.
When Die Hard was unleashed in cinemas 1988 no-one (and I mean no-one) had ever seen a film like it. It
became the prototype for the modern action movie and is still today the
benchmark against which I judge other movies of that genre. So far nothing has
come even close to giving me that exhilarating rush of adrenaline I first
watched this utterly brilliant movie. It
takes about ten minutes to set up the situation and then it’s off and there’s
not one single second of screen time wasted
in its remaining two hours.
This was the film that made Bruce
Willis a member of the A List. After two disappointing Blake Edwards films, Blind Date (1987) and Sunset
(1988), both designed (I assume) to harness the comic potential he had shown in
the hugely popular TV series Moonlighting,
he hit the big time with Die Hard and
proved that he was a movie star and not just someone destined for
made-for-television movies.
Die Hard was released at a time when the action movie genre was
dominated by the likes of Arnold Schwartzeneger and Sylvester Stallone and so
casting Bruce Willis as the wisecracking, tough, anti-authoritarian New York
cop John MCClane was a big risk for director John McTiernan. Especially after Nick
Nolte, Sylvester Stallone, Burt Reynolds, Harrison Ford, Mel Gibson, Richard
Gere and Robert DeNiro were all offered the part before Willis. McTiernan
needed an actor that could not act tough, but also look like he was clever
enough to think his way out of the situation he was in and he got in his eventual
casting of Bruce Willis.
Actually the first actor to be
offered the part of John McClane was 73 year-old Frank Sinatra and here’s the
reason why: Die Hard was based on the
novel Nothing Lasts Forever by
Richard Thorp, which was a sequel to The
Detective and because Sinatra played the main character of the novel in the
1968 film of The Detective there was
a clause in his contract that stated should they ever make a sequel he would be
given the right to reprise the role. Hmmm, Frank Sinatra running across rooftops
and crawling through ventilation ducts – I don’t think so.
Although he made an impact in his
first big budget movie, it’s not Bruce Willis who immediately springs to mind
when the original Die Hard is
mentioned in conversation. That honour belongs to British actor Alan Rickman,
who made his charismatic villain, Hans Gruber, menacing, dangerous, intelligent
and sexy all at the same time. He delivers a masterclass in movie villainy that
has never been bettered by anyone . . . in anything . . . ever.
The supporting cast are excellent.
Bonnie Bedelia as McClane’s tough wife, Reginald VelJohnson as the first officer on
the scene Sgt Powell, Paul Gleason as the pig-headed Deputy Police Chief Dwayne
T. Robinson, William Atherton, as wily reporter Thornburg, Hart Bochner as
slimy Harry Ellis, Alexander Godunov as the psychotic Karl and Robert Davi and
Grand L. Bush as Agents Johnson and Johnson.
Like most Christmas movies, Die Hard isn’t completely believable,
but it’s believable enough because it moves at such a speed that any plot holes
are quickly covered up and the Christmas themed music keeps the pace moving
constantly. But, let’s be honest, what is there not to like about this film? It
has great dialogue written by screenwriters Jeb Stuart and Seven E. de Souza that
is often very funny. It has scenes like a bare-footed McClane despatching a
terrorist and then taking his shoes off him only to find they don’t fit. And
when he sends that same dead terrorist down in the lift to join the remaining living
terrorists he ties him to a chair with Christmas lights, puts a Santa hat on
his head and attaches a note to his shirt that reads, “Now I have a machine gun.
Ho Ho Ho.”
Die Hard is our annual Christmas Day film that goes on so we don’t
have watch the depressing awfulness of Eastenders.
Why don’t you make it yours this
year?
You know it makes sense.
A Merry Christmas and a Yippee-ki-ya
to you all!
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